Waiting - Adoption Update

At the end of January I posted our adoption announcement on this blog, saying that our family might be growing by 4, 6 or 8 feet in the near future. I mentioned the fact that we were still in the "waiting for approval" stage of the home study process, so it could technically still fall through.

Well, as of this week, I am happy to report that we have officially been approved to adopt! Now it's no longer a question of "if" we will be having children through adoption, but rather, "WHEN"! :) My heart feels pregnant with anticipation! Jon and I are both so excited and thankful to God for how He has guided this process and brought us through it so quickly! Now, instead of waiting for approval, we are actually waiting for a placement! It feels somewhat surreal right now.

I have our two upstairs bedrooms all cleared out now, waiting to find out who our children are so we can tailor the rooms to their needs. I've started decorating a little bit already though, re-locating the nice lime green curtains my Mum gave me, from the living room to their bedrooms (at the suggestion of the ladies in our Hub group - thanks girls!): 

My sweet sister-in-law has also offered to give us the cutest little loft bed that our niece doesn't use anymore, if we need it, so I'm pretty excited about this:

This placement stage is the part of the process that Jon and I have decided to keep confidential and share only with each other, the Lord, and our adoption worker. This is because of the uncertainty of this stage, and the potential for emotional ups and downs as we work with CAS to find a good fit. Thankfully for the children, CAS has a child-centered approach, which means that they are looking primarily for the best parents for the children, not the best children for the parents. This does mean, however, that the placement process could be somewhat of an emotional rollercoaster for us, and we would appreciate your prayers for continued guidance as we trust God to lead us to our children. The timing of this phase is completely uncertain - the placement could happen in 2 weeks, 2 months, or a year from now. We just don't know. But once we have confirmation of the placement, we will certainly let friends and family know how many children we are bringing home, how old they are, and when they will be officially placed with us.

Thanks to all of you who have been such a support and encouragement to us through this process! I will continue posting updates as we prepare our hearts and our home for our children, sharing as much of this journey as we can with all of you.

Work For Food That Endures

Isaiah 55:2-3
Why do you spend your money for that which is not bread,
    and your labor for that which does not satisfy? 
Listen diligently to me, and eat what is good,     
and delight yourselves in rich food.  
Incline your ear, and come to me;
   hear, that your soul may live;
and I will make with you an everlasting covenant,     
my steadfast, sure love for David.

How often do I labour for that which does not satisfy? Too often. I get so busy being productive and crossing things off my never-ending "To Do" list that I often fail to come to God during the day, to delight myself in rich food - in Jesus Himself, who is the Bread of life (John 6:35).

I want my work to endure! I want to live for God and bear fruit that lasts. Even as I go about my mundane tasks. I want it all to be labour for the Lord - that's the only way it's not all meaningless and a chasing after the wind, like Ecclesiastes says. 

In John 6:27, Jesus says: Do not work for the food that perishes, but for the food that endures to eternal life, which the Son of Man will give to you. And then in John 6:29, He says that to work for the food that endures forever means simply to believe. So recently I've been reflecting on this "work" of believing that I need to be doing. 

The following are some things I wrote in my journal that I need to believe:

• That Jesus came to live the perfect life I couldn't live and to die in my place
• That He rose from the grave, breaking the power of sin and death
• That I am loved an accepted on the basis of His finished work alone
• That to live for me now is Christ, and to die is gain
• That the Holy Spirit is working in me, helping me to die to sin and obey all of God's will, commands and law
• That Jesus is the Bread of life and He is enough
• That I am labouring for something greater than food that perishes, and so in everything God can be glorified

May God help me BELIEVE and then live from that place of belief! It's so simple, but it's not easy. I want to be a woman who communes with God in the moments of my days. 

Life is comprised of moments. 

And I want to see Him in all of it.... to hear his whispers, that my soul may live, as Isaiah 55 says. As I drive to work and clean the kitchen and cook and do laundry and cross things off my to do list and balance our bank account and babysit, I long for my belief in God - who He is and all He's done - to be underneath as the driving force of all I think, say and do. I want to keep my eyes wide open and work for food that endures to eternal life. 

Today is the beginning of Lent, and I have given up Facebook again, like I did last year. I find that to be a good thing for me to step back from during this season, to intentionally focus more on this season of preparation and repentance, during which Christians anticipate the the death (Good Friday) and resurrection (Easter Sunday) of Jesus. But, after a conversation with a good friend who told me that she sensed God calling her to give up complaining for Lent, I have been trying to think about what else He may be calling me to give up... and I kept coming back to these verses in my heart and mind. I'm almost afraid to say that I'm committing to "giving up labouring for that which does not satisfy", because it's such a big thing! I struggle with it so much that I feel like I'm a failure before I even start! But even as I say that, I am reminded that this is what the Christian life is! We are not what we should be, but we press on (Phil 3:12)! And there is grace for every failure because of Jesus. I feel somewhat silly to say I'm committing to focusing my effort on "working for the food that endures" over Lent, because I already know I'm going to mess up! But, as this devotional I'm going through says (click here if you want to download it!), "Lent is a journey to the cross: meditating on our sin and weakness, looking to Jesus as our perfect example and substitute, and being heightened in our worship of his victory over Satan, sin, and death." 

So, in the end, I decided that I am going to make an extra concerted effort, starting today, to stop spending my money for that which is not bread and my labour for that which does not satisfy, and instead incline my ear to my God, that my soul may live! 

I read this blog by Sara Hagerty this morning called Messy Prayers and it totally pushed me over the edge in this decision! :) A practical way for me to begin this Ash Wednesday is to pray messy-in-the-moment prayers, because: 

Pumped for the next 40 days!